SAHMwich : rigorous honesty

Monday, June 3, 2013

rigorous honesty

http://52songproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/25_Honestly_720.png

If I am to grow in obedience to God, then I cannot be okay with lying. To myself or anyone else. Satan is called the "Father of Lies", even the smallest lie can lead to trouble. Its a dangerous activity for me, and I want to be through with it. I do not want to give the devil a foothold even with the smallest bit of dishonesty in my life!

Some questions from my OA Loop topic of the day that I answered today. I want to be able to return to these when I need to!

1. Are you committed again this day to eat in a God honoring way?
IF you deviate from this plan today will you see it as dishonest?

I AM! My POE (plan of eating) is to track my calories daily, stay within my calorie goal range, avoid trigger foods (anything with flour or sugar), and turn it all into my sponsor each evening. If I deviate from this, its probably 100% likely that I'm not working my program correctly or plugged into God-- and I often feel a extreme urge to cover this up or down-play it as not a big deal. It always is. The faster I fess up and repent, the easier it is to get back on the right track.

2.What is God teaching you about honesty? Name a bible verse that can help you to stay honest?

I'm finding out that when I feel I have been honest or think I AM being honest, I am often not. Its actually quite disturbing. When I toss out all my excuses and see them for what they are, all that's left is the truth... and the only way I can face it is with the hand of Jesus in mine!

The one whose walk is blameless is kept safe, but the one whose ways are perverse will fall into the pit. Proverbs 28:18

3 Tell of a time when the Spirit empowered you to speak the truth in love IF it was not received well, what was your response?

Most recently, I wrote a letter to my husband about things he was doing daily that had been hurting me and making things hard for me, and that God was teaching me to handle things differently (I struggle with co-dependency, and he's a believer struggling with addiction himself, but is not currently working any kind of program- just trying to deal with things on his own), and that as God shows me the way that his responsibility for himself and his own actions will be laid back upon his own shoulders. I was afraid of how he would react but did it as gently as I could, and it actually went very well. This type of communication (reading a letter vs just bringing up a subject and going back and forth about it getting us no where) was a great tool and we both decided we want to do that again. While I spoke to him and we discussed it after, I could feel the spirit of God in the room with us, and we made some real progress toward hopefully beginning to restore our marriage, and ME being able to release myself from the resentment I have been harboring toward my husband. The biggest most amazing thing about the entire conversation was the fact that I did not BLOW UP! I was able to take 10 steps back from my emotions and just listen and look at things as objectively as I could... and it was (and IS) such a blessing!

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Plan of Eating (POE)

Abstinence in Overeaters Anonymous is defined as "the action of refraining from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors while working towards or maintaining a healthy body weight. Spiritual, emotional and physical recovery is the result of living the Overeaters Anonymous Twelve-Step program.” If I have abstained from compulsive overeating, I am abstinent.

My Plan of Eating is what helps me find and maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating. My daily plan is to eat 3 meals and an optional snack without eating in between, avoid eating trigger foods, to plan my meals ahead of time, and to track my meals on my fitness pal so that I am accountable. I have a calorie goal, but that can be flexible depending on how much activity/ exercise I have had that day.

I am not perfect, I have days when I try to eat something I haven't had in a while, days where I experiement with different foods to see what I can or cannot handle. I have days where I eat compulsively, but not overeat- I am still abstinent. I have days where I didn't plan well enough and get stuck eating flour and sugar, if I didn't compulsively overeat- I'm still abstinent. If I'm sloppy with my POE I struggle more, so if I want to succeed then I try to stick with it. But not everything goes according to plan! I have to give myself grace and learn from mistakes, and pray for the willingness to stick with it.

Plan of Action

My Plan of Action is what I attempt to do daily to maintain abstinence.

Journaling/Daily Inventory

writing about my day, my feelings, praises and prayers.

Sponsorship

contacting my sponsor about what's going on with me, look for feedback and advice

Accountability Partners

friends who are in recovery with me that I can call and talk to if I need prayer, help, or just to chat and get my mind off of obsessions

Prayer

spending time with God, humbling myself, asking for my daily bread and armor

Bible Study

feeding my soul the word of God. I believe that the more I read it the more God can change me.

Meditation

spending time being quiet, allowing the Holy Spirit to move and speak to me and for me

Meetings

making going to meetings weekly a priority in my schedule

Exercise

God's natural antidepressant. Also helps me achieve a normal body weight

Proper Hygiene

getting dressed every day, doing my hair and make up every day, even if I am not leaving this house. I am a stay at home mom and it can be too easy to be lax and wear pajamas every day and not take care of myself. My body needs to be properly maintained if I am to continue life with peace and serenity

Meal Planning / Grocery Lists

important in avoiding compulsive eating/food behaviors... helps keep me on track. if my meals are planned out and the food is in the house then there is no reason for me to need to even think about it or make decisions emotionally.

Meal Tracking

on My Fitness Pal- my recovery friends are on there to keep me honest and accountable for ever bite/lick/taste. Helps me know exactly whats going in my mouth and combats mindless eating.