SAHMwich : stinking thinking

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

stinking thinking

Today I want to write about a topic that has come up several times to me this week: negative thinking, or what some like to say in this program "stinking thinking".

Sometimes these are inward thoughts like "I'm not good enough" or "what is wrong with me?"

I have noticed for myself, they tend to be thoughts about what is happening to me or other people around me. My friend is getting a divorce, a friends spouse died, I tried doing _____ and failed, my marriage sucks, my kids are bad, I feel so tired, I have too much to do, etc, etc, etc.

It's a chain reaction. Sometimes I see it, sometimes it takes someone saying something to me for me to see it, but it happens too often, too easily and too quickly. I can be full of hope and joy, and the next thing I know all I feel is despair and anger!

The last week or two, I've been struggling a bit. Not binging so much, just overeating, but I know that is very dangerous for me, and I am trying to refocus on God and the POSITIVE. I have been praying for God to reveal to me what is bringing me down, making me want to eat lately, and I realized after hearing it over and over again this week that I'm on a negative thinking binge!

The Lord gave me a great abstinent day yesterday, and it's renewed me. He put my kids to bed for a nap today as well so I could write. And then I read what finally blasted my mind wide open in a share today and I see why I've been on this roller coaster.

What is the remedy for negative thinking?

This is what I have found that works for me:
- reading positive quotes
- reading my bible
- writing a journal about my goals, focusing on ones you have achieved
- volunteering my time to serve a friend or stranger
- cleaning something
- writing a list of gratitudes
- calling someone who has helped me and telling them thank you

I'm sure there are more, feel free to add to my list! I will be adding more over time I'm 'positive' about that!

I'm done feeling sorry for myself today.

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Plan of Eating (POE)

Abstinence in Overeaters Anonymous is defined as "the action of refraining from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors while working towards or maintaining a healthy body weight. Spiritual, emotional and physical recovery is the result of living the Overeaters Anonymous Twelve-Step program.” If I have abstained from compulsive overeating, I am abstinent.

My Plan of Eating is what helps me find and maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating. My daily plan is to eat 3 meals and an optional snack without eating in between, avoid eating trigger foods, to plan my meals ahead of time, and to track my meals on my fitness pal so that I am accountable. I have a calorie goal, but that can be flexible depending on how much activity/ exercise I have had that day.

I am not perfect, I have days when I try to eat something I haven't had in a while, days where I experiement with different foods to see what I can or cannot handle. I have days where I eat compulsively, but not overeat- I am still abstinent. I have days where I didn't plan well enough and get stuck eating flour and sugar, if I didn't compulsively overeat- I'm still abstinent. If I'm sloppy with my POE I struggle more, so if I want to succeed then I try to stick with it. But not everything goes according to plan! I have to give myself grace and learn from mistakes, and pray for the willingness to stick with it.

Plan of Action

My Plan of Action is what I attempt to do daily to maintain abstinence.

Journaling/Daily Inventory

writing about my day, my feelings, praises and prayers.

Sponsorship

contacting my sponsor about what's going on with me, look for feedback and advice

Accountability Partners

friends who are in recovery with me that I can call and talk to if I need prayer, help, or just to chat and get my mind off of obsessions

Prayer

spending time with God, humbling myself, asking for my daily bread and armor

Bible Study

feeding my soul the word of God. I believe that the more I read it the more God can change me.

Meditation

spending time being quiet, allowing the Holy Spirit to move and speak to me and for me

Meetings

making going to meetings weekly a priority in my schedule

Exercise

God's natural antidepressant. Also helps me achieve a normal body weight

Proper Hygiene

getting dressed every day, doing my hair and make up every day, even if I am not leaving this house. I am a stay at home mom and it can be too easy to be lax and wear pajamas every day and not take care of myself. My body needs to be properly maintained if I am to continue life with peace and serenity

Meal Planning / Grocery Lists

important in avoiding compulsive eating/food behaviors... helps keep me on track. if my meals are planned out and the food is in the house then there is no reason for me to need to even think about it or make decisions emotionally.

Meal Tracking

on My Fitness Pal- my recovery friends are on there to keep me honest and accountable for ever bite/lick/taste. Helps me know exactly whats going in my mouth and combats mindless eating.